e·nough
adjective
1. adequate for the want or need; sufficient for the purpose or to satisfy desire interjection
2. usedto express impatience or exasperation
adverb
3. fully or quite: ready enough

 

4. in a quantity or degree that answers a purpose or satisfies a need or desire; sufficiently
What is enough?  How do you know that you will always have enough?  How do you know when you have enough?  Should I have more?
Seems to me, we always want more.  So, I guess we’ll never have enough.  I mean, I can’t seem to sit still in my thoughts about this item.
I can’t figure out if I’m being greedy or lazy.  Greedy because I think and often believe that at this point in my life, at my age, I should have more.  Just more of everything, money, property, contentment, possibilities, food, ambition, smiles, patience, foresight, and maybe most…a life.
That my existence as it is, for some reason isn’t enough?
And lazy because without certain things existing in my life, should I want to fill that gap with more?  More of everything to over shadow an emptiness?  An emptiness which sometimes feels as vast as the universe- no matter what I have more of.  I guess the real answer I am in search of is whether my life is valid as is? Or is it in need of more?
Most times, time is running circles around my life that I don’t even have the capacity to be still long enough to ask these questions.  And I only do when that voice from within can’t be ignored, won’t be ignored.
Instead of cultivating the circumstances of my life, I strewn my anxiety, into doubting why my past, present, and future presence has been enough, is enough, will be enough.  How others would never want my current existence. That they would want more for it.  And if that were true then why wouldn’t I?
Right?  Shouldn’t I want…to want more, always?
A moment of genuine peace of mind is rare in this world.  If there’s anything I want more of, that would be it.
Would I then be satisfied in a quantity or degree that answers my purpose?
Would it finally be enough?

 

One thought on “That Would Be It

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